Friday, August 4, 2017

Some Notices on Church Bulletin Boards as They Actually Appeared

● The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals. 
● The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.' 
● Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. 
● The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been cancelled due to a conflict. 
● Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help. 
● Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. 
● For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. 
● Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get. 
● The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing: 'Break Forth Into Joy.' 
● Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days. 
● A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow. 
● At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice. 
● Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones. 
● Scouts are saving aluminium cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. 
● The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. 
● Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 p.m. - prayer and medication to follow. 
● The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon. 
● This evening at 7 p.m. there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. 
● Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 a.m. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done. 
● The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday. 
● Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 p.m. Please use the back door. 
● The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy. 
● Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance. 
● Join us tonight for prayers, coffee and fresh beagles. 
● Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary. 
● This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends. 
● Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed accompanied by the pastor." 
● This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar. 
● The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who labored the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her. 
● Ushers will eat latecomers. 
● The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in. 
● The Lutheran Men's group will meet at 6 p.m. Steak, mashed potatoes, green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel. 
● Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience." 
● The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours." 
● Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered. 
● The audience is asked to remain seated until the end of the recession. 
● Wrinkled with burdens? Come to church for a faith lift!

Total Pageviews